I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
