i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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