Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
