escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
