Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
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My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
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On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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