bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Randomize