Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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