sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
