that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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