Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
