i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
