I'm laying in your front yard are you home
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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