Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
