how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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