So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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