I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
