he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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