are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
How's work?
Spinning.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Randomize
