im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
