whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
