by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
