At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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