Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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