if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
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