she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
