Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
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This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
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The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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