she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
