I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
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