just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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