It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize