so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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