Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
