of course. lets lasso hookers.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
