We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
The air was thick with penises
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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