my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
