listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize