Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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