New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
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