I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize