how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
