He disabled his match.com account in front of me
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
