Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
