I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I have surprise drugs for everyone
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I have feelings that need drinking.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Randomize
