She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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