Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize