My nipple is on Facebook.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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