So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
