Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize