i barfeds in our rink
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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