last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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