with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
